Please do not misinterpret me. Love is vital, and a magnificent component of the human experience. Yet just as emotions, love is an irrational thing. As such, it can only accentuate what is already present in a person. I do not believe love, in and of itself, could ever replace something spiteful with something beautiful.
My father is a spiteful person. The core of his humanity is full of malice. Yet I loved him all the same. What other choice does a child have? I wanted to believe that love could sustain a relationship in and of itself so I could continue to believe in my father.
I gradually learned the truth once my mother died. Without her in the picture, my father’s sanity simply disintegrated. I realized this had been his future all along. I had to face the fact I could not save him by loving him. My mother had clearly proven that fact to me.
Oddly enough, I cannot stop myself from having some love for him (and her) somewhere inside my soul…even after everything that has happened. I suppose loving is just in my nature. I am a human being after all.